You have no power over me!

This blog could also be called ‘Just say no!’ but as the sad news of David Bowie passing away reached my ears I figured this line from the Labyrinth was far more appropriate. My thoughts are with all those affected by his passing especially his nearest and dearest.

I have spent a lot of time recently stripping back my life and analysing the ways I react and the deep need I have to connect and belong and also my massive fear of rejection and I’ve decided its time to shake the tree!

I wont go in to specific details but for some years now I have struggled with the fact that I am, in my humble opinion a kind person. I try to support people, pick them up when they are down, cheer them on when things go well and provide an ear or shoulder when it is needed. This has sadly caused me to spend the last few years confused, totally confused. I am confused by the fact that there are so many people out there that are willing to take advantage of all those qualities and then turn around and not give you the time of day once they have taken what they need.

I am an empath and that is both a blessing and curse. It means that I feel deeply both in myself and more importantly with others so I fail to see how anyone can treat others based on what they can provide them with, how they elevate their own status or how them doing well reflects on them. Everyday in this particular environment I see people cheering for others, encouraging them, singing their praises etc Then within that same environment, I see someone who is not connected to them, cannot elevate them, does not reflect on them and they achieve great things yet not one person from those who cheer loudest can tear the simplest of well dones from their lips or more to the point type it on their keyboards and it makes me so sad to think how this makes them feel.

To connect someones worth to your own is injust, to make them feel worthless because it does not connect to your own worth is just beyond all comprehension.

Having witnessed this it has bought about the simple yet powerful realisation for me, nothing that an outsider will ever do or say will be good enough for any form of positive recognition within closed ranks. This in turn made me think about how hard I have tried to jam my square shape into their round shaped holes and furthermore … ding ding ding … give a prize to me for this one … how I have wasted precious moments of my life trying to prove I am worthy to people who will only value me when I become the shape they need me to be. So why then would I seek their approval anyway because if and when they do finally approve, they are not approving of me but of me becoming what they need or want me to be.

So today, for all of you out there who feel like you are just not good enough, please listen to me and listen well!


So when you step back and look at your life and see any of the above sounding familar then remember the Labyrinth line,


and walk away…

We are all precious, we have all been put on this earth with purpose (no matter if we know not yet what). We are all worthy of being surrounded by those who uplift us, who make our hearts sing and fill our days with joy and happiness so choose those, surround yourself with them, immerse yourself in them and shine brightly for who you are for the world needs you, just as you are…